Growing Up Hayden

 

We’ve named our blog, Growing Up Hayden because we feel it’s a testament to what it is to live in the now, in a world where the LGBT community is fighting for acceptance and equality.  Our content is focused on all aspects of what it is to live, love and thrive in what’s still a very judgmental world.  Growing Up Hayden is a live narrative that we hope will continue to illustrate positive changes and a more and more loving, open and welcoming world.

What’s Your Story?

We have a lot of exciting things planned for 2015.  One of those things is to launch a particular part of our website, entitled “Your Story,” dedicated to featuring members of our community.  The “Your Story” page is still in the making but soon it will be going live and will feature compelling stories from inspiring individuals, everyday all-too-often-unsung heroes.  These are people who we’ve been lucky enough to meet along our journey as we’ve built Hayden’s List, people we’ve seen on Twitter and reached out to or people who have written to us.   We can’t wait to make a space for these individuals, to pour their light right back into the community so that it may be a beacon for us all.

Do you have an inspiring story?  Do you know someone who deserves to be featured on our website?

Write to us.  Tell us your story.

 

 

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Help Your City Go Live

Help Your City Go Live

Hello Hayden’s Listers and Happy Monday!

Did you know that we have at least four cities in waiting?  “In waiting” as in debutantes awaiting to come out and join the ball!

We have reviews and just need a few more before we can make a coming out official for the following cities:

Kansas City, MO

Hartford, CT

Phoenix, AZ

Birmingham, AL

Does your city have pride?  Does it lack pride?  Have you had a good or bad experience lately in any of these communities?  We want to spread the word and allow Hayden’s List to be present in as many communities as possible.  Simply sharing your opinion on Hayden’s List might make a big difference in someone’s life.  It takes less than a minute of your time.  So, come on and help us “come out!”

 

 

 

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Hayden’s List Hurdles

hurdles

 

By: Regina Tingle

Like any new venture Hayden’s List is facing challenges. Our biggest challenge so far? Getting people to leave reviews. Sure, there are loads of people leaving reviews but the truth is, lots of people who believe in what we’re doing and who are vocal, supporting members of the LGBT community say they’re very excited to leave a review and then just don’t. We wanted to know why so we’ve asked around and received good feedback. Here are the reasons why people aren’t reviewing, including our responses:

Hurdle Number 1:
People don’t want to review a company or service provider solely based on LGBT-friendliness.

HL: There are a lot of good service providers out there who aren’t just providing good service to LGBT community members but to everyone. Would-be reviewers are finding they don’t want to review because they don’t want to “limit” the business. We understand this and we appreciate the open-minded attitude. The thing is, there are a lot people in the world who aren’t “out” yet or don’t plan on being “out” and would like to know where they might be treated fairly and equally regardless of their sexual orientation. Whether openly gay or lesbian, straight, male, female, asexual, trans; whichever way you identify or choose not to identify we are all Hayden’s List and this is our entire mission: we want to direct our community to those with open doors.

Hurdle Number 2:
People don’t want to “out” themselves by leaving a review.

HL: You can leave a review anonymously. Hayden’s List asks your first name and email address because we must verify the authencity of the review. The information provided remains anonymous and only the review is publicized.

Hurdle Number 3:
People think it takes a long time to leave a review.

HL: Actually leaving a review takes less than a minute. Some of our best reviews are less than five words.

Hurdle Number 4:
People don’t want to inadvertedly “out” a business owner by leaving a review about how LGBT friendly they are.

HL: One’s choice to be publicly “out” or not is a delicate matter that should be handled with respect and discretion. Reviewers should remember that just because a service provider is LGBT-friendly and is noted for being LGBT-friendly does not automatically categorize them as being openly LGBT themselves. As for worrying about “outing” to the larger community, chances are those who aren’t supportive of the LGBT movement aren’t spending much time looking at who’s reviewing and being reviewed on Hayden’s List.

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How Grateful We Are

How Grateful We Are

We launched just a little over six weeks ago and we’ve received quite the warm welcome from the web community. On Twitter, we’ve had nearly 50,000 views! Here’s a little list of just a few other things we’re grateful for:

• You!….… as you are part of this fantastic community that is coming together through a shared belief – that we are all entitled to love freely.
• Our collaborators, advocates and the ways we are supported by those who love us and believe in our efforts.
• The increasing number of states where same-sex marriage is legal (thankful that we live in a democracy where there’s lots of hope that soon this will be nationwide).
• For the cities we’re “out” in.
• For the reviews we’re already collecting for the cities we’re yet to come out in.
• For all the amazing people and businesses out there doing an excellent job of serving their community – especially those who are LGBT friendly.
• For all those who have felt the love and who have reviewed those businesses and given them representation on our website.
• For all of our followers on Twitter, Facebook and our Mailing List!

Last but not least, we’re grateful for how far we’ve come in the last month and for the bright future we have already in the works in helping members of our community and our allies.

Happy Thanksgiving from Hayden’s List!

HL founders laugh

– Scott, Veronica, Regina and Billy from The Hayden’s List Team

Equity vs. Equality

equality

By: Regina Tingle

It has been argued that before we deal with equality we must deal with equity. What’s the difference? Well, equality means sameness. It means giving everyone the same thing. But it only works if everyone starts from the same place. Equity however, is fairness. It means everyone has access to the same opportunities. Equity must be ensured before equality can be enjoyed. In the meantime, there’s Hayden’s List. Want to be part of the solution? Leave a review.

Universal Declaration of Human Rights

By: Regina Tingle

While on a guided tour of the United Nations in New York this week, I loved seeing Brazilian artist Octavio Roth’s rendition of the thirty articles of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

Adopted by the U.N. in 1948, the document outlines the founding principles of a democratic society. Championed by Eleanor Roosevelt, the Guiness Book of World Records calls it the most translated document in the world. Here’s a few I feel are worth repeating on the loud speakers across America.

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Lady Liberty: A Classic American Icon

Lady Liberty

Lady Liberty: A Classic American Icon
By: Regina Tingle

For the first time in my life I visited the Statue of Liberty this week. Classic American icon, symbol of freedom and rallying point of our nation, she has captured my heart and my imagination for as long as I can remember. Like many Americans, I cannot recall a time in my life when I did not know of her existence.
Lady Liberty reminds me of the journeys and voyages so many of our ancestors made in the name of freedom. Unbiased and unaffected by politics, she stands strong in her metaphor, having served for centuries as a towering, loyal witness, guardian and protector of the land of the free. Her steadfast stride breaking free of her shackles is a statement: Change means revolution.

The U.S. has a long history of challenges in the name of freedom. We are known the world over for going to great lengths to preserve and protect our ideals. But as a nation we are far from perfect when it comes to our own standards of democracy. We have made grave mistakes which have cost countless lives in the name of defending democracy and we often struggle to find a balance between promoting that democracy and protecting human rights. We sometimes fail, gravely compromising the very rights we are trying to protect, overlooking own citizens’ needs.

Lucky for us, we are also a nation always evolving, always growing, always striving to do better. The Statue of Liberty reminds me of this. Appropriately named, “Mother of exiles,” she is exquisite; bravely holding the torch that lights her own way.

The New Colossus
by Emma Lazarus
Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,
With conquering limbs astride from land to land;
Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand
A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame
Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name
Mother of Exiles. From her beacon-hand
Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command
The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame.
“Keep ancient lands, your storied pomp!” cries she
With silent lips. “Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”

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