Growing Up Hayden

 

We’ve named our blog, Growing Up Hayden because we feel it’s a testament to what it is to live in the now, in a world where the LGBT community is fighting for acceptance and equality.  Our content is focused on all aspects of what it is to live, love and thrive in what’s still a very judgmental world.  Growing Up Hayden is a live narrative that we hope will continue to illustrate positive changes and a more and more loving, open and welcoming world.

Love Wins in Natick, Massachusetts

Cari and Lauri Ryding always felt welcome in their Natick, Massachusetts neighborhood.  However when they came home from vacation, they found their porch had been vandalized with smashed eggs and their Pride flag, in honor of the Orlando victims, had been stolen.

“It was our first experience in Natick of having any type of prejudice,” Cari said. “We hadn’t experienced it all, and it kind of broke open our little cocoon.”  Cari started to rethink about how welcoming her neighborhood was after this event. But what happened next reaffirmed her belief in her neighbors.

“We said, ‘Why don’t we all have the flags? They can’t take them from all of us,’” said Dennis Gaughan, a neighbor in the Natick community. So one by one, rainbow flags popped up on houses: forty total.

Lauri was overwhelmed by the show of support from her neighbors. Lauri said “…love conquers hate. Love wins. We win.”

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NOLA Will Host NBA All Star Game

You may remember the announcement in July that the NBA decided to move the 2017 All Star Game from Charlotte, North Carolina because of the passing of North Carolina House Bill 2 (Read the HL blog here). The bill, now law, eliminates anti-discrimination protections for the LGBT community and prohibits transgender individuals from using bathrooms in public buildings that do not match their birth gender.

The decision to move the All Star Game started with Rick Welts, President of the Golden State Warriors, who is a member of the LGBT community.  At the NBA’s Board of Governors meeting in early July, he told league owners that he would not feel comfortable attending the All Star Game in Charlotte because of the passage of House Bill 2.  NBA Commissioner Adam Silver also announced that week that the North Carolina law was “in conflict with our core values…” and because of that, the league questioned the location of the All Star game.

On July 21, it was officially announced that the NBA was moving the All Star Game. Other NBA cities now had the chance to submit bids to host the game.  What’s normally an eight month process, New Orleans competed in twenty-nine days. On August 19, Commissioner Silver advised New Orleans that their bid was accepted and called the city “a world class destination for sports and entertainment.”

The move to New Orleans also stands out for another reason.  While North Carolina removed anti-discrimination protections with House Bill 2, Louisiana added protections for the LGBTQ community.  In April, Louisiana Governor John Bel Edwards signed an executive order into law that prohibits discrimination against public employees based on sexual orientation and gender identity. Louisiana is the only state in the south which has NBA teams (Texas, Oklahoma, Georgia, Tennessee, Florida and North Carolina) to have this protection.

Hayden’s List would like to thank New Orleans for being so welcoming to the LGBTQ community. Do you agree that NOLA is LGBT friendly? Check out New Orleans reviews here or submit one and let us know in the comments.

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Barbershops as a Safe Space

It’s said that if you travel to any black neighborhood, the two places you’re sure to find is a church and a barbershop.  The barbershop is a safe place for a black man to be themselves and discuss hot topics like sports and politics.  “Shape Up: Gay in the Black Barbershop” is a documentary that explores just that: the black gay man’s experience in what is one of a few safe spaces for a black man.

The director of the documentary, Derrick L. Middleton discovered that straight men in the barbershop ofter use the terms “faggots” and “sissies.”  Derrick does not believe the terms are used only in homophobia.  The language is also used not knowing that there are gay men in the barbershop.

“Straight men will ask from a genuine place if this is a real problem, because they assume there just aren’t any gay men in their barbershop,” Derrick told Out Magazine. “That’s because most of us are hiding.”

“Shape Up: Gay in the Black Barbershop” proves that gay men want to stop hiding. Derrick would love to see the barbershop become a more progressive space and challenges them to do so. However he also praises the importance of the barbershop in black communities.

Is your barbershop LGBTQ friendly? Review the shop on Hayden’s List!

See the trailer for “Shape Up: Gay in the Black Barbershop” here.

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Gays for Trump, but Trump for Gays?

I’ve never been one to fully stand with one particular party on all of their issues and stances. There are laws and bills put forward by both Republicans and Democrats that I can often stand behind, or stand against. Whether it’s fiscal responsibility, gun control measures or family rights there are multiple view points and reasons why we vote the way we do.

Recently, I came across this article, highlighting why some LGBT community members are pro-Trump, which immediately confused me.  As much as I don’t want to vote based on one issue or area (I value looking at a candidate’s full plan, ideas and past) I can’t look past the fact that Trump has aligned himself with Governor Pence.

Pence just spent the past year advocating and signing into law a bill that directly discriminated against our community.  What if this man takes this plan with him to DC?  Marriage equality isn’t exactly “equal” if a business has the right to turn my husband and I away if they don’t believe we should be married in the first place. I can’t imagine having to explain to my child why a restaurant or a business just asked us to leave.  Equality means equal and I fear Gays for Trump don’t realize that Trump-Pence isn’t for Gays.

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Another LGBT Win

Italian Olympian, Rachele Bruni has just officially upped the number of LGBT athletes competing in the Olympics this year to fifty-one.  After winning her medal and dedicating it to her “beloved,” people wanted to know who she was referring to.  It was then she admitted it was for her girlfriend who had accompanied her to Rio.  “I’ve never done a big coming out. Undoubtedly there are people who have too many prejudices, but I live peacefully. I do not think about the prejudices, I live for myself, for my passion for swimming and for the people who love me,” said Bruni.

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Obama Speaks Out Against Homophobia in Africa

President Obama visited Africa last month with something important on his agenda: equality. President Obama has compared homophobia to racism.

“…the truth of the matter is, is that if you’re treating people differently just because of who they love and who they are, then there’s a connection between that mindset and the mindset that led to racism, and the mindset that leads to ethnic conflict. It means that you’re not able to see somebody else as a human being.”

President Obama went on to compare the oppression of black people in Africa due to European Imperialism to the way LGBTQ people are oppressed in some African countries.

“You can’t, on the one hand, complain when somebody else does that to you, and then you’re doing it to somebody else,” said the President.

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Proud Parent: a label so many deserve

The following is a letter from Scott Tayloe, our Founder, in response to NBC Olympic correspondent Al Trautwig’s tweet, “They may be mom and dad but they are NOT her parents.” regarding Simone Bile’s parents.

Dear Mr. Trautwig,

Parenting, in direct definition, is the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social, financial and intellectual development of a child.

Our child, birthed by a mother and father who knew that they couldn’t support him in these various ways, chose to adopt their child to us.  From the moment we cut the cord in the delivery room we have seriously and proudly undertaken these duties.  We have changed his diapers, held him while he cried, taught him the difference between right and wrong.  We have nourished him in our home where he has a roof over his head for as long as we are alive.  We’ve given him guidance on how to act and how to speak.  We have given him a glimpse into this beautiful world with all of its great differences, differences that we believe only make us stronger as a whole.

Mr. Trautwig, based on your strong opinion on who an Olympic athlete’s parents are, I fear you don’t fully understand or grasp what it means to be a parent.  And I regret that as a parent, one of my most difficult duties is to have to explain to our son how and why it is there are people out there like you.  All we can do is remind him how proud we are to be his parents.

Congratulations, Simone, on your Olympic medals.  And congratulations to your parents on raising such an incredible and inspiring daughter.

Sincerely,

Scott Tayloe

 

Site: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parenting

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